Salah

Masalah yang sudah lalu, masalah yang tidak ingin aku ceritakan..akhirnya harus ku ceritakan karena cepat atau lambat aku harus menceritakan semua, aku tak bisa bertahan menutupi..

Harusnya dari awal, harusnya dari dia bertanya..tapi semua terlambat..

Aku memberitahu masalah ini ketika dia tidak siap, ketika dia tidak dalam kondisi yang baik..betapa egoisnya diriku..tidak memikirkan kondisinya..

Sekarang hatipun tak tenang, dia yang kusayang tidak dapat menghapus masalah ini dengan mudah..aku menyakitinya, padahal yang kuingin dia bahagia..tapi ternyata akupun menyakitinya..

God, what should i do..? i won't give up, but please show me the way..even i have to let him go, show me how..

Spamming Random

sorry for spamming here..
i just don't know what to do . ..can't talk to anyone..

love me or leave me..

i can't fix everything in my past..

tired..but still want to try my best..

is it going to be easy and happy ending..?

negative is really not good for anyone..

it can't be done if only 1 person showing effort to make it beautiful..

it takes times & 2 person to make a beautiful journey..

i'm not gonna letting u go, until u say it to my face..sorry, but i don't want to understand

what i need from u..what u need from me ..

in the end..i hope everything will be okay. ..and i'm part of it..

or..

u're gonna be happy without me..

only God know..
i'm just doing my best..

Do the best & let God do the rest..
pray, believe, and make it happen..

Slowly

Slowly falling..

don't know what to do. ..this is what i'm afraid of..not enough for u..hurting u..u hurt bcos of me..bcos of my past..i hate to see u hurt like this..half thing have changed..like u don't appreciate all that i do..don't turn and walk away..

d.o.n.t k.n.o.w w.h.a.t t.o d.o

if crying will solve the problem, i'll cry all night.

Tuhan..help..

Tuhan..tolong bantu aku spy bisa melewati masa" ini..lewatin masa ini dgn baik sehingga di depan lebih bisa baik drpd sblm..tolong ya, Tuhan..
bantu aku spy lbh kuat utk menghadapi ini..
bantu aku spy lbh terima keadaan..
bantu aku spy bisa selesain semua..
Help me, God..i'm begging You..

Tired but happy

-night thoughts..*i think i should get this out from my mind..

Even though i feel so tired when u're surrounded by negative thoughts, in the other side i'm happy with u. ..makes me laugh, loving me with sincerely..i know & i realize i'm happy with u, i don't wanna lose u. ..

God..help me to find a way, make the negative thinking go away & let me love him with all of my heart..

Goodnite, universe . ..nite, JM..*kiss*

not enough

why is the title 'not enough'..?

Well..all of this time, i observed & realize. ..that none of us will saying 'enough' for so many thing..true or true..? Maybe one time we think that everything is more than enough, but the next day u'll find out everything is not enough for u..

We want this, we want that. ..we craving for that, we craving for this..when we got what we need, we apparently craving what we want..agree or agree..?

i'm write about this bcos i know we're human being. ..it's normal, we want more and more..but, it's makes me thinking all over again, until when we can say 'yess..it's enough for me & i'm thankful'...?!

i'm so thankful with mylife now...but, i'm just human..sorry if i can't be perfect..i made mistakes & learn from it..if someone dislike my past, well, i'm not live for making anyone happy..but, i'm going to makes me & my beloved one (s) happy..don't try to stop me..

so, love me or leave me with 'not enough' thingy..? u choose..

Bitter - Sweet

-REALationship-

Is it true if we meet again with someone in the past, it's means we're for one another..? Mm..i don't know, but i'm hoping that it's true. ..

i've talked about him in my blog on Oct 17th..he's the one that i wishing for, he's the different man..

Short of story..i didn't choose between JH or KR..why..?? i don't have any chemistry. And i meet this guy (again), well i named him JSN in my last post..now, i call him - JM..☺

Maybe i'm too naive, but i really want him to be happy..he's fulfilling my life now, complete my colors..sometimes BITTER, sometimes SWEET. ...balancing my life..do not want to be careless, but he's in my dream. ..and i hope this relationship can work out for both of us ..

But if i wasn't right for him. ...i'll be glad if i know he's happy with the right person..without me in his world..

Right now i just want to make him sure about what i feel & what i want..make him happy. ...i need him to believe that i do this all just for him..
God bless us (˘ʃƪ˘)
God, please show us the way. ..is it right for us to step together or is this indicate us that we should meet with the wrong person before meeting the right one..? show me...